Thursday, July 23, 2009

Happiness

I really think that these past 10mos (since Christopher was born), have been the happiest time of my life! I feel like since August 31st of last year that I have been on a high. I have such peace in my life now that's he's here. You always have that fear (mostly unfounded too) that you might never have kids.

I have everything I want in my life right now. I have a wonderful husband who is a great father and the most precious son! I find I love being a mom and taking care of my little boy. I love the diaper changes, feedings, playing, holding, reading, crying. I have treasured every minute with him, even the 3am feedings bc I know this time is so fleeting. He is so dependent on me right now and has no judgements about me and can't get mad at me; all things that will change as he gets bigger. I wish I could freeze him in time and keep him as a baby, I really don't want him to turn one!

I love kissing his soft little hair and I think he is just the most beautiful baby. I'm so prideful about it, it's shameful. I'm approached by so many people who tell me how cute he is, I get "Gerber baby" more times than I can count. I even had a worker at Baby Gap give me info to have him model for the company. lol! The ultimate compliment I've ever received was from my mom. When she saw his 2week pics she looked at him and said "I had some cute babies (I know my mom always took pride in that too), but I never had a baby this beautiful" and she sincerely meant what she said.

I've wanted to write this blog for awhile but I've been hesitant bc I know many moms (especially new moms) don't feel the same way. I think 80% of moms suffer post-partum depression and many also have a hard time adjusting to motherhood which is normal. I've been so lucky to not have experienced any of that. For me, I never felt that motherhood was much of an adjustment, it was actually going back to "normal" for me to have baby to take care of (that's how life in my family was).

Of course it's not always rainbows and butterflies as a mom. There are days where I feel I go from one dirty diaper to another, but then I think these are supposely the happiest years of a person's life (20's) and I have more than some people in their 30's do! I never thought I get married so young, especially in college. I figured I'd be somewhere in my mid-20's when I met the right person. Being blessed with the opportunity to parent at such a young age, when I have so much energy is a dream. I didn't need to spend my 20's finding myself, being uber sucessful with a career or partying. If I never did anything more in my life than raise my son, the little creature God entrusted to my care, I'd be perfectly satisfied.

4 comments:

  1. awe that is such a great posting! Motherhood truly is the best. I remember growing up and just really wanting to be a wife and mother. Like seriously, I know I went to college for Marketing and maybe when our children are off to highschool and/or college I might do something with that (or work nonprofit again for chastity)....but seriously I feel so satisfied being a stay at home mom. It is a shame how people probably think, "that's it?" You know that they wish they could do the same if they sacrificed! lol When I was teaching with genlife we would ask the kids what they wanted to be when they grew up. We would get answers like; a teacher, an actor, a lawyer, a doctor, and then you got the rare occassion where a girl would say, "a mom." That always put such a smile on my face....like I wanted to say, "yes and it is most certainly acceptable and extremely wonderful of a blessing to be at home with your childre...it's ok!" :)

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  2. thanks! yeah, it's such a shame that our culture views being a stay at home mom the way it does, like you're not "self-acutalizing" or "making something of yourself." if you can finicially do it, i think staying at home is a great gift you can give your children.

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  3. What a beautiful way to look at motherhood! I think the same thing about "finding myself" and partying. The bar scene was never really my thing and I grew quite a bit in college. I still grow everyday, but at my core, I know who I am and I don't feel lost. It's a blessing.

    Chris and I definitely want to be the ones to raise our kids too. While staying at home is not a financial option b/c of our student loans, at least nursing is flexible enough for us to only need to find childcare over the weekends if we both work. Lucky for us, we have parents close by! For me I feel both a calling to Motherhood and nursing, and with the job flexibility I can do both.

    Like you though, my desire to be a Mom is SO strong, that even if that's all I ended up doing with my life, I know it'd definitely be worth it! Can't wait to join the Mommy Club! Thanks for sharing!

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  4. Beautiful, MJ!! I love what you mentioned about those in our culture "finding themselves." I hear all the time 35ish year old women putting off children until they "find themselves." The moment I found myself was the moment I held my baby for the first time. In so many ways I do not think you start truly living until you have children. Having them teaches you so much about who you are. Taking a lifetime to "find yourself" will not teach you more about yourself than living one day as a parent.

    As a SAHM, I really hate that title. As if I "stay" on the couch all day. More days than not I am running here and there going to this appointment, picking up that rx, or getting groceries. and my baby is not even in soccer yet.lol. When my husband is asked "what I do" (because it is assumed that I have a career) , his reply is that I raise our daughter at home. I do not "stay" at home but rather I "raise" at home. LR

    Your baby is amazingly adorable!

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